Enjoy a stress-free Valentine's Day (From Daily Echo)

Enjoy a stress-free Valentine's Day

5:11pm Tuesday 12th February 2013 in News

WE probably have pre-conceived ideas about what makes us happy on Valentine’s Day. If we’re in a relationship, spending time with our loved one in the most romantic of settings might be our desire. Here are some tips that will increase your happiness levels, reduce stress levels and make this your best Valentine’s Day ever:

Communicate your desires to your partner.

Have you ever given a friend or a family member a birthday present or Christmas gift and they seemed disappointed with your choice, and it made you feel stressed? Looking back you may have said to yourself or even to them, “If you’d have told me what you wanted I would have selected something different”.

Fantasize it going well

Have you ever said to yourself before a night out, “This is going to be a good night,” and it turned out to be a great night? And you fantasized in detail who and what you would see, hear and do on the evening. This is an affirmation. It is a statement you believe or want to believe in.

For example: “Valentine’s Day is going to be fabulous, it’s going to be the best ever”

If you frequently say or think positive affirmations, with feeling and sincerity, they will eventually become self-fulfilling prophecies that can help you.

Writing your affirmations down on post-it notes to stick around the house, or having them as your computer screensaver, will act as a regular reminder of how you’d like to be, or what you would like to have. Whilst you’re at it, leave special, romantic notes for your loved one around the house too. It will make the build up to the day even more exciting!

Perfectionism

A perfect evening, a perfect partner, etc can only ever be a fantasy. Being imperfect doesn’t mean we don’t do our best, it means that if ours or our partners plans don’t go according to plan that we don’t berate ourselves or them! Tell yourself that whatever happens you will make the most of it.

Focus on what you can do, not what you can’t do.

How does it make you feel when you think about things that you can’t do that you really want to do?

Perhaps you’d love to spend Valentine’s Day with your partner, but they are working away from home? Or you’ve not been able to book a table at your favourite restaurant?

Instead of focussing on what you can’t do, focus on what you can do. You could plan to do something special when you do get a chance to see each other again or you could have a romantic skype call instead. Book another restaurant or cook a romantic meal for two at home. It’s not about where you are, it’s all about who you’re with and how you relate to each other.

What we say to ourselves “What if Valentine’s doesn’t go as planned,?

What if, it turns out to be awful? What if your partner doesn’t approve of how it goes?”

What we say to ourselves in our mind or out loud, effects how we feel. What if we imagine a positive, uplifting outcome?

“What if Valentine’s Day turns out even better than I could have imagined?” and imagine in mouth-watering, exquisite detail how you would like your’s and your partners special day to be.

Which sentence makes you feel more upbeat? The second one hopefully?

Be Grateful

When was the last time you said ‘Thank you’ either in your mind, or even better, directly to your partner, with sincerity for something that he/she had said or done, or for just being them? Say it with deep wholehearted feeling. Notice how you feel about your partner when you say this and notice how this uplifts and helps you feel more upbeat.

However your Valentine’s Day celebrations turn out, have fun. Create special memories for you both to look back on.

There are many more strategies that will reduce stress levels and increase our happiness levels in Moving on Up! Secrets to an Upbeat and Happy Life by Nita Saini, foreword by Barefoot Doctor Actor Stephen Fry “It’s Excellent!”

• Available as an e-book or paper format, from Amazon, Waterstones, Itunes, Barnes and Noble and others. To find out more about Moving on UP! and for free audio downloads visit movingonupthebook.com