SO, I am sat in bed with my laptop, thinking about what to write in my first column.

I’ve got a multitude of topics I could focus on: my partner Greg’s stage 4 cancer, my role as his carer, an appointment with a new specialist in a few days, our two crazy girls Dali and Bay, their upcoming birthdays two weeks apart that I am yet to think about planning, our blind dog Little Milk who seems to find navigating the furniture harder by the day. The list goes on and never ends.

There is so much to say about all of these things but instead, I am going to focus on something radical: me.

My roles as mum and carer take up so much time, so much emotional and physical energy that often it is easy to collapse at the end of the day and not have had one moment to think about myself.

Although my situation may be different from others in their 30s, I don’t think I’m alone in this; so many of my friends feel the same.

Having both cancer and small children in our lives means learning lessons at the speed of light.

One of my biggest has been to prioritise myself in order to recharge my batteries, stay afloat and do this without guilt.

I can’t pour from an empty cup.

This often means accepting all help offered, so this morning the girls are out causing chaos with their grandparents somewhere.

Today, focusing on me will manifest itself by eating toast in bed, having a glass of wine with my lunch and catching up with a friend.

Just for now, I will live in this self-care bubble and pretend that the devastation of breakfast downstairs didn’t happen and that maybe it has miraculously disappeared.

l Stacey Heale has put her career as a fashion lecturer on hold to focus on her two little girls and fiancé, Delays frontman Greg Gilbert, who was diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer in November 2016. She launched the viral campaign Give4Greg to raise funds for lifesaving treatment through GoFundMe: gofundme.com/give4greg. You can read more from Stacey at her blog, beneaththeweather.com