Grieving mum begs thieves to return items stolen from baby's grave

Daily Echo: Kate Rainscourt at the grave of her baby son Charlie, from which thieves have stolen toys and flowers. Kate Rainscourt at the grave of her baby son Charlie, from which thieves have stolen toys and flowers.

THEY were precious gifts from a grieving mum still trying to come to terms with the death of her first child.

Kate Rainscourt had been finding comfort in leaving toys and colourful flowers at the grave of her baby Charlie, who was stillborn less than a year ago.

But in the space of three weeks, thieves have struck twice at Holly Hill Cemetery in Sarisbury – removing a teddy bear, a plastic digger and colourful plastic flowers.

The theft has been described as “sickening” by one of Hampshire’s top politicians.

Police have already launched an investigation and want witnesses to come forward.

Kate has been left devastated by the crime – and wants to warn others that thieves may be operating in the area.

The 33-year-old, of Cornflower Close, Locks Heath, said: “We went to the grave three weeks ago and the teddy was missing. At first we thought an animal might have taken it away.

“But then we went back again and more items had gone.

“To the person who is doing this, I would say ‘Please stop and put the items back’. They are only simple things but that is not the point.

“We left a plastic digger there because we wanted him to have it like any other child might. Leaving it there was the only way to give our son a gift.”

Related links

Charlie was stillborn when Kate was just 26 weeks pregnant, in August last year. Since then she and husband Dan have made regular visits to the cemetery, in Barnes Lane.

Kate added: “It still feels like yesterday that we lost Charlie. He was our first child and to think that somebody would want to steal these things is horrible.”

Fareham Borough Council’s executive leader Sean Woodward said such incidents were rare at Holly Hill, which had proved such a well-loved cemetery that it was now full.

He added: “It just sounds one of the most sickening crimes. This is extremely unusual and an utterly pointless theft.”

A police spokesman said: “We will be investigating it and are appealing for anyone who might have seen or heard anything suspicious in the area to come forward and assist us with out enquiries.”

Anyone with information should call police on 101 or Crimestoppers anonymously on 0800 555 111.

Comments (35)

Please log in to enable comment sorting

2:31pm Thu 31 May 12

Georgem says...

Sick. But I have to ask: why leave toys? I understand the sentiment, but they don't really expect a toy to just stay there, do they? It's just as likely to be some kid who fancied a digger, as it is a gang of hardened teddy bear thieves.
Sick. But I have to ask: why leave toys? I understand the sentiment, but they don't really expect a toy to just stay there, do they? It's just as likely to be some kid who fancied a digger, as it is a gang of hardened teddy bear thieves. Georgem

2:36pm Thu 31 May 12

tiamariakiss says...

I am absolutely appalled by this, I genuinely feel for this couple as my mum is buried at St Mary's Extra on Butts Road. Her grave has been vandalised 5 times now and people need to realise it is heartbreaking enough visiting a loved ones grave let alone to fine things stolen and other things smashed up. These people who do this sicken me.
I am absolutely appalled by this, I genuinely feel for this couple as my mum is buried at St Mary's Extra on Butts Road. Her grave has been vandalised 5 times now and people need to realise it is heartbreaking enough visiting a loved ones grave let alone to fine things stolen and other things smashed up. These people who do this sicken me. tiamariakiss

2:55pm Thu 31 May 12

Condor Man says...

I buried my son at the Sustainability Centre near Droxford. There are few disruptions there. I can understand why they put the toys there but to steal them is beyond the pale.
I buried my son at the Sustainability Centre near Droxford. There are few disruptions there. I can understand why they put the toys there but to steal them is beyond the pale. Condor Man

2:58pm Thu 31 May 12

Linesman says...

Unlike flowers left at a grave, toys do not wither and die, they become litter.
Unlike flowers left at a grave, toys do not wither and die, they become litter. Linesman

3:07pm Thu 31 May 12

eurogordi says...

Without wanting to sound cold and callous, this story also shows how we as a nation cannot cope with death, whatever age a person dies.

I have no problem with remembering people close to me who are no longer alive, and I like to place fresh flowers on the graves of those I knew and still love.

BUT, I am increasingly offended by others who place toys, windchimes, artificial flowers, large ornaments etc. which turn peaceful graveyards into little more than tacky fun fairs.

Those in control of cemeteries and graveyards should insist that only headstones and fresh flowers are allowed, and anything else should be prohibited and/or removed.

If people wish to have a shrine with other objects, they are free to do so in the privacy of their own homes and gardens, but the majority of people would like the deceased to rest in peace within the places they are buried (which is why the majority of graves DO NOT have unnecessary items placed upon them).
Without wanting to sound cold and callous, this story also shows how we as a nation cannot cope with death, whatever age a person dies. I have no problem with remembering people close to me who are no longer alive, and I like to place fresh flowers on the graves of those I knew and still love. BUT, I am increasingly offended by others who place toys, windchimes, artificial flowers, large ornaments etc. which turn peaceful graveyards into little more than tacky fun fairs. Those in control of cemeteries and graveyards should insist that only headstones and fresh flowers are allowed, and anything else should be prohibited and/or removed. If people wish to have a shrine with other objects, they are free to do so in the privacy of their own homes and gardens, but the majority of people would like the deceased to rest in peace within the places they are buried (which is why the majority of graves DO NOT have unnecessary items placed upon them). eurogordi

3:38pm Thu 31 May 12

thbao2011 says...

i cannot believe some people here can be offended by what people put on there loved ones grave! i lost my baby son and my other children see toys in shops that they think there baby brother would of liked so they put them on his grave ...its a comfort and its there way of dealing with death! everyone deals with it differently and no one has the right to criticise how or what other people do to there loved ones grave.a grave is a dark place for a baby and by putting toys and flowers and teddys make it brighter place for them which is a big comfort.i am DISGUSTED that anyone could write on here and say its wrong or it should be band... how bloody disrespectful!! i hope that this mum doesn't see these comments .... its been 7yrs since my son died and i was outraged and so hurt that people could be so low..no one can understand it because people deal with it in different ways and i hope the scum that did it gets what they deserve! .... try and have some respect people and stop being so shallow!
i cannot believe some people here can be offended by what people put on there loved ones grave! i lost my baby son and my other children see toys in shops that they think there baby brother would of liked so they put them on his grave ...its a comfort and its there way of dealing with death! everyone deals with it differently and no one has the right to criticise how or what other people do to there loved ones grave.a grave is a dark place for a baby and by putting toys and flowers and teddys make it brighter place for them which is a big comfort.i am DISGUSTED that anyone could write on here and say its wrong or it should be band... how bloody disrespectful!! i hope that this mum doesn't see these comments .... its been 7yrs since my son died and i was outraged and so hurt that people could be so low..no one can understand it because people deal with it in different ways and i hope the scum that did it gets what they deserve! .... try and have some respect people and stop being so shallow! thbao2011

4:15pm Thu 31 May 12

eurogordi says...

thbao2011 says that toys on graves are "a comfort and its there way of dealing with death". S/he then continues by writing "no one has the right to criticise". Yet this is exactly what s/he is doing to me by failing to respect those who wish burial grounds to be places of quietness and reverence. In some burial grounds rules are strictly enforced and rightly so in my opinion. Personally I believe that those who die have gone to a better place nd would not want us to continue mourning their death and our loss. That doesn't mean we forget them, far from it, but turning a grave into a shrine will not, cannot and does not reverse the power of death. That is not being insensitive by the way, it is simply stating fact.
thbao2011 says that toys on graves are "a comfort and its there way of dealing with death". S/he then continues by writing "no one has the right to criticise". Yet this is exactly what s/he is doing to me by failing to respect those who wish burial grounds to be places of quietness and reverence. In some burial grounds rules are strictly enforced and rightly so in my opinion. Personally I believe that those who die have gone to a better place nd would not want us to continue mourning their death and our loss. That doesn't mean we forget them, far from it, but turning a grave into a shrine will not, cannot and does not reverse the power of death. That is not being insensitive by the way, it is simply stating fact. eurogordi

4:57pm Thu 31 May 12

Georgem says...

eurogordi wrote:
thbao2011 says that toys on graves are "a comfort and its there way of dealing with death". S/he then continues by writing "no one has the right to criticise". Yet this is exactly what s/he is doing to me by failing to respect those who wish burial grounds to be places of quietness and reverence. In some burial grounds rules are strictly enforced and rightly so in my opinion. Personally I believe that those who die have gone to a better place nd would not want us to continue mourning their death and our loss. That doesn't mean we forget them, far from it, but turning a grave into a shrine will not, cannot and does not reverse the power of death. That is not being insensitive by the way, it is simply stating fact.
I 100% agree. But you're always going to look like the bad guy saying stuff like this. Especially if you yourself have not lost a child.
[quote][p][bold]eurogordi[/bold] wrote: thbao2011 says that toys on graves are "a comfort and its there way of dealing with death". S/he then continues by writing "no one has the right to criticise". Yet this is exactly what s/he is doing to me by failing to respect those who wish burial grounds to be places of quietness and reverence. In some burial grounds rules are strictly enforced and rightly so in my opinion. Personally I believe that those who die have gone to a better place nd would not want us to continue mourning their death and our loss. That doesn't mean we forget them, far from it, but turning a grave into a shrine will not, cannot and does not reverse the power of death. That is not being insensitive by the way, it is simply stating fact.[/p][/quote]I 100% agree. But you're always going to look like the bad guy saying stuff like this. Especially if you yourself have not lost a child. Georgem

6:17pm Thu 31 May 12

Northamboy says...

The choice to put toys or whatever on loved ones graves is a personal thing to the bereaved. It's nothing to do with anyone else apart from those who look after the cemetery. If its not allowed then so be it but if it's allowed then its up to those who place them there.

Everyone who is old enough to walk in a graveyard should know to take items from graves is wrong.

I feel sad for this poor Mum mourning her little boy, such a shame this has happened.
The choice to put toys or whatever on loved ones graves is a personal thing to the bereaved. It's nothing to do with anyone else apart from those who look after the cemetery. If its not allowed then so be it but if it's allowed then its up to those who place them there. Everyone who is old enough to walk in a graveyard should know to take items from graves is wrong. I feel sad for this poor Mum mourning her little boy, such a shame this has happened. Northamboy

6:23pm Thu 31 May 12

Stillness says...

It's hard to understand anyone taking things from a grave. It is also hard to understand anyone leaving things at a grave no mater what your beliefs (if any).
It's hard to understand anyone taking things from a grave. It is also hard to understand anyone leaving things at a grave no mater what your beliefs (if any). Stillness

9:59pm Thu 31 May 12

-stiv- says...

The toys would have gone rotten, moldy etc. There's better ways of coming to terms with grief.

Hey, maybe a child took it to play with?

I feel for this lady, she's still grieving. I hope in time she can start to heal. I hope she knows there are qualified people to talk to to help work through these things.
The toys would have gone rotten, moldy etc. There's better ways of coming to terms with grief. Hey, maybe a child took it to play with? I feel for this lady, she's still grieving. I hope in time she can start to heal. I hope she knows there are qualified people to talk to to help work through these things. -stiv-

10:03pm Thu 31 May 12

sainyglen74 says...

Firstly my thoughts go out to the parents as they have obviously planned and looked forward to having a child and their love showed by leaving those gifts. Everyone deals with grief in their own manner and does what is best for them at the time. To steal those things is disgusting but putting my mind at the incident I can't help thinking that it may have been children doing the taking who should know better but have perhaps not have been educated in the correct manner by their parents to respect such places of rest.
Just my thoughts on the matter and my feelings go out to the loved ones.
Firstly my thoughts go out to the parents as they have obviously planned and looked forward to having a child and their love showed by leaving those gifts. Everyone deals with grief in their own manner and does what is best for them at the time. To steal those things is disgusting but putting my mind at the incident I can't help thinking that it may have been children doing the taking who should know better but have perhaps not have been educated in the correct manner by their parents to respect such places of rest. Just my thoughts on the matter and my feelings go out to the loved ones. sainyglen74

10:04pm Thu 31 May 12

Amyj2012 says...

Surely it is up to the individual to leave what they like for their love ones. Some of you may
Not like the thought of toys but that's your choice and don't think you have the right to comment especially at this sad story! These are babies/children why shouldn't we leave a small toy at their grave stone. Nothing wrong there at all. I just hope the person who has done this to this poor family is totally ashamed!
Surely it is up to the individual to leave what they like for their love ones. Some of you may Not like the thought of toys but that's your choice and don't think you have the right to comment especially at this sad story! These are babies/children why shouldn't we leave a small toy at their grave stone. Nothing wrong there at all. I just hope the person who has done this to this poor family is totally ashamed! Amyj2012

10:46pm Thu 31 May 12

Ted Rogers says...

I feel for the couple who have lost their child. It wouldn't be my choice to use a cemetery to remember a deceased loved one, however lots of people do.

The self appointed cemetery police on here turn my stomach with their hypocrisy.
I feel for the couple who have lost their child. It wouldn't be my choice to use a cemetery to remember a deceased loved one, however lots of people do. The self appointed cemetery police on here turn my stomach with their hypocrisy. Ted Rogers

10:57pm Thu 31 May 12

userds5050 says...

Georgem wrote:
eurogordi wrote:
thbao2011 says that toys on graves are "a comfort and its there way of dealing with death". S/he then continues by writing "no one has the right to criticise". Yet this is exactly what s/he is doing to me by failing to respect those who wish burial grounds to be places of quietness and reverence. In some burial grounds rules are strictly enforced and rightly so in my opinion. Personally I believe that those who die have gone to a better place nd would not want us to continue mourning their death and our loss. That doesn't mean we forget them, far from it, but turning a grave into a shrine will not, cannot and does not reverse the power of death. That is not being insensitive by the way, it is simply stating fact.
I 100% agree. But you're always going to look like the bad guy saying stuff like this. Especially if you yourself have not lost a child.
I'm going to stop using this site until the Echo mods do something about the repeated trolling by the same individuals day after day. It's insensitive and offensive. Grow up.
[quote][p][bold]Georgem[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]eurogordi[/bold] wrote: thbao2011 says that toys on graves are "a comfort and its there way of dealing with death". S/he then continues by writing "no one has the right to criticise". Yet this is exactly what s/he is doing to me by failing to respect those who wish burial grounds to be places of quietness and reverence. In some burial grounds rules are strictly enforced and rightly so in my opinion. Personally I believe that those who die have gone to a better place nd would not want us to continue mourning their death and our loss. That doesn't mean we forget them, far from it, but turning a grave into a shrine will not, cannot and does not reverse the power of death. That is not being insensitive by the way, it is simply stating fact.[/p][/quote]I 100% agree. But you're always going to look like the bad guy saying stuff like this. Especially if you yourself have not lost a child.[/p][/quote]I'm going to stop using this site until the Echo mods do something about the repeated trolling by the same individuals day after day. It's insensitive and offensive. Grow up. userds5050

6:43am Fri 1 Jun 12

freemantlegirl2 says...

userds5050 wrote:
Georgem wrote:
eurogordi wrote:
thbao2011 says that toys on graves are "a comfort and its there way of dealing with death". S/he then continues by writing "no one has the right to criticise". Yet this is exactly what s/he is doing to me by failing to respect those who wish burial grounds to be places of quietness and reverence. In some burial grounds rules are strictly enforced and rightly so in my opinion. Personally I believe that those who die have gone to a better place nd would not want us to continue mourning their death and our loss. That doesn't mean we forget them, far from it, but turning a grave into a shrine will not, cannot and does not reverse the power of death. That is not being insensitive by the way, it is simply stating fact.
I 100% agree. But you're always going to look like the bad guy saying stuff like this. Especially if you yourself have not lost a child.
I'm going to stop using this site until the Echo mods do something about the repeated trolling by the same individuals day after day. It's insensitive and offensive. Grow up.
I don't happen to agree with Georgem and Eurogordi on this issue but how are they 'trolling' ? trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction. They have only expressed an opinion and another point of view and unless I'm missing something haven't been nasty....

I think this is a matter of personal choice, children's sections of graveyards are often like this and it's a free country and people should be albe to express themselves as to how they see fit without having others ruining that experience.

If I may make a small suggestion to mum. Could you possibly do a donation in his memory to SANDS or to the maternity unit in his memory - that way it will help others and be a lasting memorial to him that no-one else can 'sully'. I'm so very very sorry for your loss, it must be devastating.
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Georgem[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]eurogordi[/bold] wrote: thbao2011 says that toys on graves are "a comfort and its there way of dealing with death". S/he then continues by writing "no one has the right to criticise". Yet this is exactly what s/he is doing to me by failing to respect those who wish burial grounds to be places of quietness and reverence. In some burial grounds rules are strictly enforced and rightly so in my opinion. Personally I believe that those who die have gone to a better place nd would not want us to continue mourning their death and our loss. That doesn't mean we forget them, far from it, but turning a grave into a shrine will not, cannot and does not reverse the power of death. That is not being insensitive by the way, it is simply stating fact.[/p][/quote]I 100% agree. But you're always going to look like the bad guy saying stuff like this. Especially if you yourself have not lost a child.[/p][/quote]I'm going to stop using this site until the Echo mods do something about the repeated trolling by the same individuals day after day. It's insensitive and offensive. Grow up.[/p][/quote]I don't happen to agree with Georgem and Eurogordi on this issue but how are they 'trolling' ? trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction. They have only expressed an opinion and another point of view and unless I'm missing something haven't been nasty.... I think this is a matter of personal choice, children's sections of graveyards are often like this and it's a free country and people should be albe to express themselves as to how they see fit without having others ruining that experience. If I may make a small suggestion to mum. Could you possibly do a donation in his memory to SANDS or to the maternity unit in his memory - that way it will help others and be a lasting memorial to him that no-one else can 'sully'. I'm so very very sorry for your loss, it must be devastating. freemantlegirl2

8:30am Fri 1 Jun 12

userds5050 says...

"Trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction." I'd say that's exactly what they're doing.
"Trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction." I'd say that's exactly what they're doing. userds5050

8:31am Fri 1 Jun 12

Georgem says...

userds5050 wrote:
"Trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction." I'd say that's exactly what they're doing.
I thought you were going to stop using the site?
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: "Trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction." I'd say that's exactly what they're doing.[/p][/quote]I thought you were going to stop using the site? Georgem

8:45am Fri 1 Jun 12

freemantlegirl2 says...

userds5050 wrote:
"Trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction." I'd say that's exactly what they're doing.
Sorry i don't happen to agree, they are allowed an opinion. there are just as many supporting the family, it's about balance and no-one has been nasty....
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: "Trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction." I'd say that's exactly what they're doing.[/p][/quote]Sorry i don't happen to agree, they are allowed an opinion. there are just as many supporting the family, it's about balance and no-one has been nasty.... freemantlegirl2

8:50am Fri 1 Jun 12

Georgem says...

freemantlegirl2 wrote:

I don't happen to agree with Georgem and Eurogordi on this issue but how are they 'trolling' ? trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction. They have only expressed an opinion and another point of view and unless I'm missing something haven't been nasty....


It's the 'another point of view' thing that bothers a lot of people, for some reason. Some people just can't grasp that theirs isn't the only one.

As for the story, I really feel sad for the mum, it must be horrible. But I think it's unrealistic to leave toys in what is essentially a public place, and expect them to stay there. I'm more inclined to think a child has taken them, and is enjoying them, than this is an act of malice.
[quote]freemantlegirl2 wrote: I don't happen to agree with Georgem and Eurogordi on this issue but how are they 'trolling' ? trolling is deliberate attempts to upset and provoke reaction. They have only expressed an opinion and another point of view and unless I'm missing something haven't been nasty....[/quote] It's the 'another point of view' thing that bothers a lot of people, for some reason. Some people just can't grasp that theirs isn't the only one. As for the story, I really feel sad for the mum, it must be horrible. But I think it's unrealistic to leave toys in what is essentially a public place, and expect them to stay there. I'm more inclined to think a child has taken them, and is enjoying them, than this is an act of malice. Georgem

9:26am Fri 1 Jun 12

userds5050 says...

No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'. userds5050

9:37am Fri 1 Jun 12

Stillness says...

userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one. Stillness

9:55am Fri 1 Jun 12

userds5050 says...

Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.
No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.
[quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.[/p][/quote]No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful. userds5050

11:11am Fri 1 Jun 12

Georgem says...

userds5050 wrote:
Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.
No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.
I haven't said toys left on a grave is litter at all. I agree, that IS a disgraceful comment.
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.[/p][/quote]No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.[/p][/quote]I haven't said toys left on a grave is litter at all. I agree, that IS a disgraceful comment. Georgem

11:11am Fri 1 Jun 12

Georgem says...

userds5050 wrote:
Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.
No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.
I haven't said toys left on a grave is litter at all. I agree, that IS a disgraceful comment.
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.[/p][/quote]No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.[/p][/quote]I haven't said toys left on a grave is litter at all. I agree, that IS a disgraceful comment. Georgem

11:16am Fri 1 Jun 12

Georgem says...

userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Far better to be posting 'provocative' comments, than trotting out the exact same trite cliches on every story, in my view.

I'm not saying YOU do that, but it's the status quo here. About 95% of the comments are stock responses posted by the same people every time certain subjects come up.
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Far better to be posting 'provocative' comments, than trotting out the exact same trite cliches on every story, in my view. I'm not saying YOU do that, but it's the status quo here. About 95% of the comments are stock responses posted by the same people every time certain subjects come up. Georgem

11:22am Fri 1 Jun 12

Stillness says...

userds5050 wrote:
Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.
No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.
You forgot to say "in my humble opinion". In my opinion you have yet again stated your view as a being a fact. Do you not understand the difference?
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.[/p][/quote]No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.[/p][/quote]You forgot to say "in my humble opinion". In my opinion you have yet again stated your view as a being a fact. Do you not understand the difference? Stillness

11:31am Fri 1 Jun 12

userds5050 says...

Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.
No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.
You forgot to say "in my humble opinion". In my opinion you have yet again stated your view as a being a fact. Do you not understand the difference?
This isn't Twitter.
[quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.[/p][/quote]No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.[/p][/quote]You forgot to say "in my humble opinion". In my opinion you have yet again stated your view as a being a fact. Do you not understand the difference?[/p][/quote]This isn't Twitter. userds5050

11:36am Fri 1 Jun 12

Georgem says...

userds5050 wrote:
Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.
No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.
You forgot to say "in my humble opinion". In my opinion you have yet again stated your view as a being a fact. Do you not understand the difference?
This isn't Twitter.
Why do you keep re-iterating that this isn't Twitter? We're all perfectly aware of that.
[quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.[/p][/quote]No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.[/p][/quote]You forgot to say "in my humble opinion". In my opinion you have yet again stated your view as a being a fact. Do you not understand the difference?[/p][/quote]This isn't Twitter.[/p][/quote]Why do you keep re-iterating that this isn't Twitter? We're all perfectly aware of that. Georgem

11:40am Fri 1 Jun 12

userds5050 says...

Georgem wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
Stillness wrote:
userds5050 wrote:
No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.
Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.
No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.
You forgot to say "in my humble opinion". In my opinion you have yet again stated your view as a being a fact. Do you not understand the difference?
This isn't Twitter.
Why do you keep re-iterating that this isn't Twitter? We're all perfectly aware of that.
It was a joke. Stillness was saying I didn't know the difference between my own opinions and facts. Oh, never mind.
[quote][p][bold]Georgem[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Stillness[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]userds5050[/bold] wrote: No, you can have a point of view. It's when you're posting provocative comments on every story. I don't think the Echo mods should have allowed comments on this article, but that's just 'another point of view'.[/p][/quote]Just your point of view of course. Your problem is that you expect everyone to have the same view as you. Best of luck with that one.[/p][/quote]No, everyone's entitled to their opinion. It's freedom of speech innit? The Echo doesn't allow comments on every story, they have mods who remove offensive posts. This isn't Twitter. I'm sorry but someone saying toys left on a grave is litter is disgraceful.[/p][/quote]You forgot to say "in my humble opinion". In my opinion you have yet again stated your view as a being a fact. Do you not understand the difference?[/p][/quote]This isn't Twitter.[/p][/quote]Why do you keep re-iterating that this isn't Twitter? We're all perfectly aware of that.[/p][/quote]It was a joke. Stillness was saying I didn't know the difference between my own opinions and facts. Oh, never mind. userds5050

3:54pm Fri 1 Jun 12

Amyj2012 says...

I think a lot of these posts above should be removed! A poor family is reading all these post and I feel it's like Facebook, just people coming in here to be horrible. Let's hope something like this don't happen to some of you on here!
I think a lot of these posts above should be removed! A poor family is reading all these post and I feel it's like Facebook, just people coming in here to be horrible. Let's hope something like this don't happen to some of you on here! Amyj2012

4:22pm Fri 1 Jun 12

angelmiarose says...

i can not belive that some people feel they have the right to tell people what they can and cant put on someones grave, and for some people to say that people who leave stuff on graves other than flowers should get over the fact that there loved one has died is awful. most graves that have things on are childrens graves and are normally in a section with other children so i suggest if you dont like looking at the tacky stuff as some of you put it dont go near them, as a parent whos daughter was stillborn this is our place where we go to feel close to her and her brother and sisters like to leave stuff there, we know that she wont get it but it helps in the grieving stage. NO grave should be touched by people who have nothing to do with it and should ALWAYS be respected. for the people who feel they should just have a headstone i hope you never lose a child its the hardest thing parents have to go through so like i said if you dont like it dont look at it and keep your hurtful opinions to yourselves !!!!!!!!!!!!!
i can not belive that some people feel they have the right to tell people what they can and cant put on someones grave, and for some people to say that people who leave stuff on graves other than flowers should get over the fact that there loved one has died is awful. most graves that have things on are childrens graves and are normally in a section with other children so i suggest if you dont like looking at the tacky stuff as some of you put it dont go near them, as a parent whos daughter was stillborn this is our place where we go to feel close to her and her brother and sisters like to leave stuff there, we know that she wont get it but it helps in the grieving stage. NO grave should be touched by people who have nothing to do with it and should ALWAYS be respected. for the people who feel they should just have a headstone i hope you never lose a child its the hardest thing parents have to go through so like i said if you dont like it dont look at it and keep your hurtful opinions to yourselves !!!!!!!!!!!!! angelmiarose

8:38pm Fri 1 Jun 12

sainyglen74 says...

angelmiarose wrote:
i can not belive that some people feel they have the right to tell people what they can and cant put on someones grave, and for some people to say that people who leave stuff on graves other than flowers should get over the fact that there loved one has died is awful. most graves that have things on are childrens graves and are normally in a section with other children so i suggest if you dont like looking at the tacky stuff as some of you put it dont go near them, as a parent whos daughter was stillborn this is our place where we go to feel close to her and her brother and sisters like to leave stuff there, we know that she wont get it but it helps in the grieving stage. NO grave should be touched by people who have nothing to do with it and should ALWAYS be respected. for the people who feel they should just have a headstone i hope you never lose a child its the hardest thing parents have to go through so like i said if you dont like it dont look at it and keep your hurtful opinions to yourselves !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Spot on my dear...it is pathetic but this newspaper is provoking debate after debate. It's not morally correct is it?
[quote][p][bold]angelmiarose[/bold] wrote: i can not belive that some people feel they have the right to tell people what they can and cant put on someones grave, and for some people to say that people who leave stuff on graves other than flowers should get over the fact that there loved one has died is awful. most graves that have things on are childrens graves and are normally in a section with other children so i suggest if you dont like looking at the tacky stuff as some of you put it dont go near them, as a parent whos daughter was stillborn this is our place where we go to feel close to her and her brother and sisters like to leave stuff there, we know that she wont get it but it helps in the grieving stage. NO grave should be touched by people who have nothing to do with it and should ALWAYS be respected. for the people who feel they should just have a headstone i hope you never lose a child its the hardest thing parents have to go through so like i said if you dont like it dont look at it and keep your hurtful opinions to yourselves !!!!!!!!!!!!![/p][/quote]Spot on my dear...it is pathetic but this newspaper is provoking debate after debate. It's not morally correct is it? sainyglen74

10:18pm Fri 1 Jun 12

Amyj2012 says...

angelmiarose wrote:
i can not belive that some people feel they have the right to tell people what they can and cant put on someones grave, and for some people to say that people who leave stuff on graves other than flowers should get over the fact that there loved one has died is awful. most graves that have things on are childrens graves and are normally in a section with other children so i suggest if you dont like looking at the tacky stuff as some of you put it dont go near them, as a parent whos daughter was stillborn this is our place where we go to feel close to her and her brother and sisters like to leave stuff there, we know that she wont get it but it helps in the grieving stage. NO grave should be touched by people who have nothing to do with it and should ALWAYS be respected. for the people who feel they should just have a headstone i hope you never lose a child its the hardest thing parents have to go through so like i said if you dont like it dont look at it and keep your hurtful opinions to yourselves !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Totally agree with what your saying. I personally have never had to deal with something like this apart from older members of family passing away but I'm a mum and would be exactly the same.
[quote][p][bold]angelmiarose[/bold] wrote: i can not belive that some people feel they have the right to tell people what they can and cant put on someones grave, and for some people to say that people who leave stuff on graves other than flowers should get over the fact that there loved one has died is awful. most graves that have things on are childrens graves and are normally in a section with other children so i suggest if you dont like looking at the tacky stuff as some of you put it dont go near them, as a parent whos daughter was stillborn this is our place where we go to feel close to her and her brother and sisters like to leave stuff there, we know that she wont get it but it helps in the grieving stage. NO grave should be touched by people who have nothing to do with it and should ALWAYS be respected. for the people who feel they should just have a headstone i hope you never lose a child its the hardest thing parents have to go through so like i said if you dont like it dont look at it and keep your hurtful opinions to yourselves !!!!!!!!!!!!![/p][/quote]Totally agree with what your saying. I personally have never had to deal with something like this apart from older members of family passing away but I'm a mum and would be exactly the same. Amyj2012

4:21pm Sat 9 Jun 12

fareham_man3 says...

Don't shoot the messenger.

People wo have lost a loved one are highly emotionally charged which is extremely normal in these circumstances.

The regulations for this cemetary are:

No memorials, memorial tablets or vases shall be erected without the prior approval of the Council, application for which shall be made on the memorial application form.

All memorials, and other monuments, shall be of natural stone or other approved materials.

This is just to put things in perspective.
Are the people who maintain the cemetary to choose which rules the enforce?

I do not work at the Cemetary.
Don't shoot the messenger. People wo have lost a loved one are highly emotionally charged which is extremely normal in these circumstances. The regulations for this cemetary are: No memorials, memorial tablets or vases shall be erected without the prior approval of the Council, application for which shall be made on the memorial application form. All memorials, and other monuments, shall be of natural stone or other approved materials. This is just to put things in perspective. Are the people who maintain the cemetary to choose which rules the enforce? I do not work at the Cemetary. fareham_man3

Comments are closed on this article.

click2find

About cookies

We want you to enjoy your visit to our website. That's why we use cookies to enhance your experience. By staying on our website you agree to our use of cookies. Find out more about the cookies we use.

I agree