11:26am Wednesday 28th April 2010
By Kate Thompson
I GET very anxious when I think about what would happen if I had to go into hospital for an operation and couldn’t be here.
“I just don’t know what would happen to my boys,” said Francesca Lambert.
“If it ever happened they would have to go into emergency care and I know the boys wouldn’t like that.”
The mother-of-four from Southampton is desperate to find a respite foster carer who can help to share the load when it comes to looking after her twin sons Eric and Joe aged 9, born with Downs syndrome. They are lovable and engaging lads but quite a handful for Francesca, 46, who also has an 11-year-old daughter Amber and a 19-year-old-son Sean.
In the past she built a strong relationship with respite carer Jenny but when ill-health forced her to give up, Francesca began to question what the future might hold.
“We had such a brilliant relationship with Jenny and that is what I would like for the boys to have again. At the moment I feel they are missing out on their childhood. I can’t take the both of them out at the same time as they need the full attention of one person for each of them.
“My son Sean is a great help but soon he will be leaving home and then I don’t know what I will do,” she said.
When Francesca needs a break, the boys can go to the Rose Road Centre and while they enjoy their time there, Francesca would like them to build links with a local family.
“It needs to be someone who wants to work with children with special needs and who can be another family for the boys. For me to know there is someone there who can have regular contact with the boys, would be such a comfort,” she said.
Having a break, when the boys go to the Rose Road Centre means Francesca is able to recharge her batteries and working with a respite foster carer would help share the load.
“Everything we do is like a military operation.
“We can never do anything on the spur of the moment. It all has to be planned down to the last detail.
“Any respite carer who does help us would be there for the boys and offering me support as a parent too,” she said.
There are many reasons why a child may need respite care. For example, a single parent may be going into hospital and have no friends or family who could care for their child. Respite foster carers also offer longer term foster carers a break, usually for weekends. There may also be occasions where respite care maybe needed for more serious reasons, such as a birth parent or parents being unable to look after their children as they may have been arrested.
In Francesca’s case, her children place special requirements on her and specialist respite care would give her a well earned break.
Conversely, respite foster care can also offer a break to a child or children from their parents, offering stability both in terms of environment, structure, diet etc, while Social Services work with the birth family to resolve issues and improve parenting so that their child will no longer have to be taken into respite or any other kind of care.
• To find out more about becoming a respite foster carer call Greg Allen, recruitment officer for Foster Care Services at
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