Seeing red? (From Daily Echo)

Is society getting angrier?

10:10am Sunday 7th November 2010 in News Review By Paula Thompson, Senior Feature Writer

Seeing red?

IF anybody needed proof that anger levels were rising, just try negotiating the M271 during rush hour.

Only this week I found myself being shouted and sworn at by two motorists simultaneously. First the outraged car driver to my rear, who took objection to my allowing a lorry out of the grid-locked slip road and onto the grid-locked motorway, and then the lorry driver himself, who mistakenly thought the blaring car horn was mine.

No doubt Mr Road Rage behind was in such a hurry to get home, that four-second delay made all the difference to his journey.

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But these outbursts of rage aren’t confined to our roads.

Who hasn’t experienced fury at being put on hold while “soothing” music plays over the phone and an automated voice assures us how important our call is?

And we’ve surely all felt that flare of anger when a queue-hopper sidles ahead of us at the checkout.

In the past there might have followed a very British ripple of outraged tutting and over-exaggerated sighing.

But today, these everyday irritations seem just as likely to end in a heated confrontation, or worse, a full-blown physical attack.

This week 20-year-old Phillip Bergen was jailed for four years after attacking pensioner Kenneth Colquhoun over a dispute about who should go first at the petrol pumps.

The drama happened at the Picket Post filling station near Ringwood and saw Bergen throwing a milkshake over one of Mr Colquhoun’s passengers before punching him in the head.

And last June, engineer Stephen Howes attacked his neighbour with a rubber mallet after a feud over a cat-scare device.

So what is behind this mounting rage in our society?

Mike Fisher, director of the British Association of Anger Management (BAAM), says the economy is partly to blame.

“The recession perpetuates stress and fear which in turn fuels anger,” he said.

“We can definitely say that anger levels are increasing. Eight months ago we were averaging 250 hits to our website a day – now it’s 330.

“We’re becoming more and more like an American-based homogenous culture. We expect instant gratification. In other words, we want it and we want it now.

“This is particularly apparent in younger people who experience something we call FOMO (Fear of Missing Out).

“They have become so used to having instant access to data and communication through social networking sites and new technology, they don’t know what it means to have patience.”

Tell that to Britain’s motorists – as a nation we are now considered the road rage capital of Europe.

“Incidents of road rage and sudden violent temper are the result of accumulative stress,” said Mike. “It’s the old ‘straw that broke the camel’s back’ situation. After a series of stressful incidences people feel they have a right to respond aggressively – we call it righteous anger.”

What’s more, says Mike, some of us may be more inclined to aggression than others.

“A high percentage of the people who come to us for help have been bullied as children. Couple a trauma with a bit of testosterone and you’re likely to have a fieryy character on your hands.”

Southampton counsellor Erika Keulling agrees that childhood experiences can affect how we deal with anger as adults.

“When parents don’t set consistent boundaries for their children they grow up confused about what is appropriate and what is not.”

But clinical phychologistDr Nick Maguire from the University of Southampton believes angry incidents may not be on the rise – we may just be noticing them more.

“It’s like when you buy a new car, you suddenly see that car everywhere. Actually what you’re doing is selecting information from the environment that’s salient to you. So if we think people are getting angrier we notice more angry incidents.”

Another theory is that we are dealing with our anger in a different way. Rather than seething quietly, perhaps we are now more likely to confront others.

“We get angry when we perceive our personal rules have been contravened,” said Nick. “We start making assumptions about the other person’s motives. For example, if somebody cuts into a traffic queue we assume it’s deliberate.

“We have this idea about our territory and if someone moves into it there’s a sense they have encroached on our space. Of course they may have just made a mistake, which is irritating, but anger comes when we assume they’ve done it purposely to annoy us.”

So the best way to cool our tempers?

“Counting to ten really is a good solution,” said Nick. “When we get angry we have an immediate surge of adrenaline and an urge to react to the emotion but if you can pause for a while that emotion will drain away.”