COLUMNIST and trained counsellor Fiona Caine answers another round of reader dilemmas.

BOYFRIEND WANTS TO KEEP PREGNANCY QUIET

I’m 16 and pregnant and still live at home with my parents, who don’t yet know about it. My boyfriend is 18 and thinks we should try to keep things quiet for a while, as both sets of parents will hit the roof when they find out.

He says he wants to find a way to break it to them gently, but although I’m also worried how they’re going to react, I’m not sure I want to hide this from my parents. When I told my boyfriend I wanted to tell them, he became angry.

FIONA SAYS: YOU DO NEED SUPPORT

If you are pregnant, it really is best to seek the appropriate support as soon as possible.

Your boyfriend is clearly worried as to how your parents will react. I don’t know why he thinks delaying telling them will make things any easier. Point out to him that they are more likely to be angry the longer you leave it. Instead of hiding from his responsibilities, your boyfriend needs to face up to them.

I think you’re right to feel upset and confused though - he shouldn’t be putting pressure on you.

I believe you need to trust your instincts here and tell them - you need support. Your parents may be distressed, even angry, but I am sure their concern will be for you.

Speak to your GP or Brook as soon as you can.

MY HUSBAND DIED AND I FEEL LOST

I am in pieces. My husband died last week - he was only 54 and although he was overweight and had diabetes, he seemed quite healthy. He had a stroke, then he caught Covid-19 and that was that.

Now I don’t know what to do. I don’t know who to turn to for help and I’m not coping. Both our children have left home, and the house feels so empty. I can’t imagine my life without him in it.

I can’t get over the fear that I was responsible, as although he always stressed that we needed to be careful, I perhaps wasn’t as careful as I should have been.

What if I picked it up and brought it home?

FIONA SAYS: THAT SOUNDS SO HARD - SUPPORT IS OUT THERE

It’s a huge trauma, and sadly an awful lot of people are going through something similar right now - including the fear that they may be in some way responsible.

Being on your own in an empty house doesn’t sound good for you right now - do you, perhaps, have a friend who could move in? Or is there someone you could stay with?

I would also really encourage you to make contact with Sudden (sudden.org), an early intervention service set up specifically to help people cope with sudden deaths.

If you have a problem you need help with, email Fiona by writing to help@askfiona.net for advice. All letters are treated in complete confidence and, to protect this privacy, Fiona is unable to pass on your messages to other readers. Fiona regrets that she cannot enter into personal correspondence.