COLUMNIST and trained counsellor Fiona Caine answers another set of reader dilemmas.

MY HUSBAND IS LEAVING PRISON - BUT MY BOYFRIEND DOESN’T WANT ME TO SEE HIM

I have two children and live with my boyfriend. He’s alright I suppose, but he can’t hold down a job and doesn’t let me do any of the things I’d like to do.

My real problem though is that my husband is getting out of prison soon, and I’m sure there’s going to be trouble.

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Before he went inside, he was often violent, but he says prison has changed him and that he’ll leave me alone, as long as I let him have access visits to the kids. My boyfriend says I should have nothing to do with him but I’m still worried, as if I’m being asked to choose between them. How do I decide what’s the best thing to do?

FIONA SAYS: WHY LET EITHER OF THEM DECIDE?

You don’t have to decide between the two of them because you have a third option - get rid of them both!

Neither is likely to provide you with the long-term support and love you need to raise your children, so why not break away and make your own life?

You probably can’t completely cut your husband out of your life though, as your children do have a right to see their father, if this is considered appropriate by the courts.

MY HUSBAND IS SO ANXIOUS ABOUT LOSING HIS JOB AGAIN

Back in 2017, my husband was made redundant from the company he’d been with for nearly 15 years. He was devastated at the time, but fortunately found another job fairly quickly.

At the time, we had three children all under eight and money was very tight. He’s been with the new company ever since and has worked really hard for them and been promoted twice. The problem is though, he’s now terrified the same thing will happen to him again.

FIONA SAYS: FOCUS ON YOUR WELLBEING AS A FAMILY

I am very conscious of the fact a great many people are going to be left without jobs and in debt because of the pandemic, and the effect it’s had on employment (amongst many other things). I wish I could tell you that it will be alright, but I really can’t because who knows what will happen after all this.

Obviously, if you could get a job, it might take some of the pressure off him, but the marketplace is hugely competitive. That’s doesn’t mean you can’t help. Give your husband all the support and love he needs.

Email help@askfiona.net for advice.