http://www.scenesouth.co.uk/_images/misc/headers/single.jpg Sally wonders if you really can have your cake and eat it.

From: Sally Churchward
To: Julian Robinson
Sent: Monday, December 10, 2007 12.23 PM

Right, here’s a potentially thorny one. What do you think about dating more than one person at once? In theory, and as an avid fan of Sex and the City, I think it makes sense. After all, if you’ve just started seeing someone maybe it’s a bit false/premature to be exclusive. But then again, I’d hate it if I was dating someone and I found out he were dating someone else, especially if I hadn’t known from the outset. Do you think it’s desirable to date more than one person if you’re up front about it? Or is it just heading into all sorts of trouble?


From: Julian Robinson
To: Sally Churchward
Sent: Monday, December 10, 2007 1.05 PM

I suppose I shouldn’t knock it because I haven’t tried it...but I have to say it sounds like unnecessary trouble and far too much stress. I agree with you, I’d
be rather put out to find I was the subject of a dual
dating experiment. Also, wouldn’t it be awkward if you saw the second person when you were arm in arm with the number one choice? And if you do go for wining and dining
more than one person at a time, won’t your life just end up being a longer version of speed dating?


From: Sally Churchward
To: Julian Robinson
Sent: Monday, December 10, 2007 1.41 PM

Also, it’s not like potential dates are falling off trees. Yes, if two complete strangers asked you out on the same day and they both seemed like potentials it would make sense to go out with them. But mostly there’s someone you’ve had your eye on or have a bit of a connection with and then you start dating. So if we’re talking about people you kind of know, you’d think you’d already know which one you preferred and wouldn’t have to go through the minefield of dating both at once. And I could definitely never be dating more than one person and not tell all concerned. Keeping up the subterfuge would be exhausting. I think it’s one of those things that sounds good, because people like to think of themselves as cool, fun, breezy etc, but for me, to try to pull it off would be going against my nature.


From: Julian Robinson
To: Sally Churchward
Sent: Monday, December 10, 2007 3.03 PM

Mine too. But maybe we should call an American and see what they reckon! They’d probably be aghast at our prudish lack of dating spirit – after all, they multi-date like there’s no tomorrow and if it doesn’t work out they just shrug their shoulders and get on with it. There’s something to be said for that. However, I still think that if you start dabbling in the two-date arena on this side of the pond, you’d better be ready to face the consequences.