Meeting a true Noble man

After encountering some down right unhelpful "celebrities", my manna from heaven came to me in the form of the Geordie comic who talked to me for the guts of an hour. I think I smiled afterwards for the whole day.

Ross and I have a conversation. Like I think we might be having if we were in the pub having a pint, which I suppose stems in part from the fact that at 27 he is only a year older than myself.

Now gradually emerging from his semi-anonymity, I think I'm getting nearer the days when I will be able to say "Ross Noble", and people won't go "Who?". And let me assure you, a little bit of Ross will lighten your life.

He has been a comic since he was 15 when he performed in venues and then snuck out the back door to avoid getting arrested - a bit young surely to be exposed to the harsh realities of pub life?

"That whole time was quite weird - it's only now people say 'Oooh, but you were 15'. It didn't register that it was weird to be doing because at that age you don't reason. I didn't really think about it and it was fair enough - someone threw a pint, wahey! Nothing happened that struck fear into me. I was kind of fearless except for this one night there was a drunk old man in a pub in Newcastle and he staggered towards the stage.

"I did compere quite a lot - I used to be the host at a student gig at Sunderland University. Now, Newcastle University was a joy - but at Sunderland they were just hurling abuse. That put me off student gigs I can tell you. There's just a big mass of drunk students at a disco and suddenly the Arts and Ents officer stands up and says, 'Now here's a comedian'."

Were his parents not concerned about him being in that environment so young?

"Me mam says even now that whenever they come to see me she looks around and nervousness creeps in, but once I get started, it's fine. They were really good. I was rubbish at school so when I went 'I want to do this' they went like 'Thank God, he's found something he can actually do'. If I hadn't discovered stand-up, I'd be knackered. I literally couldn't do anything else. If it's in my head, it comes out my mouth. I think I'd be fired a lot."

And he certainly seems to have found his vocation. As well as developing a successful line in live performance, he has also appeared on Radio Four's Just A Minute, and very successfully run the gauntlet of Have I Got News For You, on which he'll appear again soon.

Was he inspired by any types of comic to develop the observational style which has become his trademark?

"I'm a comedy trainspotter. All I saw when I was younger were your Saturday night entertainment shows like Jimmy Tarbuck and Brucie, but I always liked comics from folk clubs like Jasper Carrot, Mike Harding and Billy Connolly. I was aware of the Goons and the Pythons - I used to get the tapes out of the library 'cos we didn't have a video. I was always a comedy fan but always on audio. It was only when I was older that I was actually allowed to see stuff.

"It was a bizarre mix of the mainstream and more obscure. I used to listen to Radio 4 a lot and tape stuff off it like Just A Minute. It's been on the radio longer than I have been alive. Then the first time I did Just A Minute, I was more nervous than my first gig at stand-up. The music started and it was like being IN the radio. The show I did before that was probably the funniest one I've ever been involved with. I thought 'Oh my God, I'm meant to be taking part!' I was too busy sitting there listening!

"Nowhere else in the world has that same rich history of radio. There was some of it in America but there isn't that same churning out of the half-hour comedy tradition."

Is he happy now that he is becoming more and more of a "name" in the business?

"It's weird how that all happens. I think it's very much like bands - you go from that good, gigging-away stage and then suddenly people think 'Oh I like that tune' and it spreads. There's a definite moment where it all happens. It's good 'cos it's sort of panning out how I wanted it. I have always wanted to build it on a live base and then do bits of TV which I really like."

"I did a gig last night and Ian McKellen was on. I did one with him before but now he's Gandalf, you know what I mean? All of a sudden. These aren't good examples, I know - bands and classical actors."

Ross has declared himself to be wary of television and doing too much in the way of appearances. Is he concerned about becoming over-exposed?

"It's not that I'm anti-tele - it's just that the more TV you do, the more it takes away from what you do live. I kept getting offered panel games and turned them all down, except HIGNFY, 'cos it's the best. I only go on shows if I would sit at home and watch it."

So about the hair - is its length directly in correlation with his success? He laughs for a while before responding.

"I actually had that exact thought when I was driving along in the car the other day. It's become a bit of a trademark - but it's a bit dangerously long. But of course now that The Darkness are all the rage with their '70s hair, it's acceptable. I might have it cut before Christmas when I go to Australia. At least then I can test the water".

And why no smiles in your publicity pictures? Again, he laughs.

"Whenever I smile I look absolutely awful. I despise pictures of comedians when they're going 'Hey, look at me, Mr Wacky'. When your picture is taken for the paper, they say, 'Oh, go on and do something crazy' and I just say 'No'. Take. The. Picture. You can really tell a fake smile too, it's a bit of a cheat - that's why I don't do it."

When I tell him that I'm really disappointed that he didn't get his bum out when I saw him perform live, and I have read that he does this a lot, we spend about 10 minutes discussing the number of times he got his nethers out in Australia, taunting fellow comedian Adam Hill by cavorting naked among the fake statues on the stage.

Once, a comedian on stage was abusing the other performers on the bill, who were assembled in a glass-fronted bar at the back of the room.

He approached the bar and was there with his back to the comedians when Ross got revenge.

"I slowly just dropped my pants, walked alongside the window and leant against it with my bum."

Ah, what a man. Thank you, Ross.

Ross Noble will be appearing at The Anvil on Thursday 13 November at 8pm. Tickets, priced £14, are available from the box office on 01256 844244 or online at www. theanvil.org.uk